Schedules for (Almost) Everyone During Closures
Talk about uncharted territories, amiright? Last week as we awaited the inevitable closures of schools I thought, wtf am I going to do with a toddler all day? And then I thought, wtf did I do last summer when we were on summer break with each other? The answer - schedules. Then, of course, the moms/teachers/parents/therapists who are one step ahead of me started posting their own schedules online.
The general idea is that during a time that can look and feel quite unstructured, adding structure will help. Last summer on my first day of break with Oscar I was overwhelmed with an empty day ahead of me. I thought, "If this is hard for me, someone who teaches 5 year olds every day, how hard must it be for everyone else?" I also thought, "HOW do I do this every day at school?" With a one year old looking at me I answered my own question - make a schedule. I had a moment where I thought that it was a little extra. Maybe I was being that mom by creating a schedule but it made the days easier.
I did a quick scan of what parents were looking for on our neighborhood parent group on Facebook. Basically it is everything. Some parents want balanced schedules of free time and activities. Some want worksheets to keep their kids busy. Some want no worksheets - they only want engaging activities. Some want screen time, some want none. Some want to replicate what would be happening at school, some want to give their kids a well deserved break. As a teacher trying to help as many people as possible - I felt a little overwhelmed looking at all these needs.
As I said, uncharted territories. What I have to offer is resources. Here are a few schedules I've come across. Then there are some suggestions for what to do to create your own. I also shared the one I made for myself. Later this week I'll update with resources that are free for parents looking for how to fill the scheduled or unscheduled time. Good luck and don't forget to get fresh air, take deep breaths, and remember we can do this. I'll keep you posted on how it's looking for me!
Right now, here are schedules I am seeing the most:
An academic schedule from a stay at home mom:
This one is a joke, but let's be honest, maybe not too far off.
If these schedules don't work from you, here are some suggestions.
1. Think about your limits and your possibilities. Do you have to work with kids at home? How big is your space? Is your work time flexible or do you need to be on call during certain hours? Maybe you try to get up before your kids to do some work. Maybe you have to leave your kids at home because you are a healthcare worker. Maybe you live in a house with a backyard. Maybe, like me, you live in 900 square feet in a third floor apartment with a toddler and you both have to work and your toddler doesn't give a crap about your work schedule. We all have places where we will need some structure and some where we will need to compromise.
2. Be patient with yourself. This is new for everyone. Chances are if your kid is screaming in the background of a conference call, the other person/people on that call will also have a screaming child. (Cue video clips of that BBC interview. This is what is coming for all of us.) Some days might go according to plan. Somedays you will turn on Sesame Street on Amazon Prime and let it run all day so you can get what you need to get done. Most days will be a mix of ups and downs.
3. Be for real honest with yourself and your situation. I know folks who live with anxiety and depression. This is a tough time to carry that load. Perhaps you practice social distance but also social media distance. My Google Pixel has an app called Digital Wellness. I can set time limits on all my apps. If I meet that limit the app shuts down. Binging shows and movies can be great but if you know that will keep you inside and start a downward spiral, make a plan.
4. Schedules for kids? One size will not fit all. Do you have a child with a disability? ADHD? Look to your child's teacher for support. You don't have to have a degree - this is why we do. You might start to see your child acting in ways that are new to you. As educators we know that kids react to stress and anxiety in a variety of ways. Heck, you probably know this too. I mean, look at how adults react. Remember, sometimes it may seem like a tantrum or a meltdown comes out of nowhere. Our brains don't fully develop our prefrontal cortex (the part that keeps you planning and organized) until we are 30. (Perhaps this is why we see so many 20-somethings out there ignoring the call for social distance? SMH) Your child doesn't know what to do when their schedule changes. It works for a couple days but 2 - 10 weeks is different. They will look to you to set and enforce limits. As someone who has been in education for 15 years, and a parent for almost two years, I can tell you the best thing I have learned is that limits are love. Repeat that. Limits are love.
5. I saw someone ask about incentives. I think for some people this is a great idea! If you think this will work for your kid I have a couple suggestions. One is to make sure your child will earn that prize and it cannot be taken away. Another great tip is to reinforce your child using strategies rather than just getting tasks done. Saying "if" indicates that they might not earn that tv. But if your kid walked away 5 times and only missed one, there is going to be quite a fight after they feel like they worked so hard. By saying "when" you are telling your child you know they will get there and as soon as they do, bells will be ringing!
6. Kids under 5 years old. Whelp, good luck. Ha! My own toddler has no idea what a sticker chart is. I have no idea what is going to happen when the SO and I both have to have calls this week. I'm planning on living life in 15 - 30 minute chunks of time. Or perhaps one episode of Sesame Street at a time. I'm making a schedule for me, but I know it's going to change. Just like the world around us. Every. Damn. Minute.
Here's my schedule. Two adults, one working full time, one working 5 hour days, 900 square feet, no outdoor space, one toddler, two cats. We are early to bed and early to rise. Your life is different so if you want to use mine, adjust as needed, ignore as needed, laugh at my attempts to adult as needed. We'll see what happens. Good luck. You got this. WE got this. Don't forget to breath.
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| Music lessons with QuestLove on Sesame Street. Note the drum on the changing pad. #toddlerlife |
The general idea is that during a time that can look and feel quite unstructured, adding structure will help. Last summer on my first day of break with Oscar I was overwhelmed with an empty day ahead of me. I thought, "If this is hard for me, someone who teaches 5 year olds every day, how hard must it be for everyone else?" I also thought, "HOW do I do this every day at school?" With a one year old looking at me I answered my own question - make a schedule. I had a moment where I thought that it was a little extra. Maybe I was being that mom by creating a schedule but it made the days easier.
I did a quick scan of what parents were looking for on our neighborhood parent group on Facebook. Basically it is everything. Some parents want balanced schedules of free time and activities. Some want worksheets to keep their kids busy. Some want no worksheets - they only want engaging activities. Some want screen time, some want none. Some want to replicate what would be happening at school, some want to give their kids a well deserved break. As a teacher trying to help as many people as possible - I felt a little overwhelmed looking at all these needs.
As I said, uncharted territories. What I have to offer is resources. Here are a few schedules I've come across. Then there are some suggestions for what to do to create your own. I also shared the one I made for myself. Later this week I'll update with resources that are free for parents looking for how to fill the scheduled or unscheduled time. Good luck and don't forget to get fresh air, take deep breaths, and remember we can do this. I'll keep you posted on how it's looking for me!
Right now, here are schedules I am seeing the most:
An academic schedule from a stay at home mom:
She also offers other resources in that article.
This schedule is a little less academic. This would work if you have a parent at home who does not have to work the entire day and wants some breathing room. Or maybe you're happy to take a break from academics a bit during the day.
This one is a joke, but let's be honest, maybe not too far off.
If these schedules don't work from you, here are some suggestions.
1. Think about your limits and your possibilities. Do you have to work with kids at home? How big is your space? Is your work time flexible or do you need to be on call during certain hours? Maybe you try to get up before your kids to do some work. Maybe you have to leave your kids at home because you are a healthcare worker. Maybe you live in a house with a backyard. Maybe, like me, you live in 900 square feet in a third floor apartment with a toddler and you both have to work and your toddler doesn't give a crap about your work schedule. We all have places where we will need some structure and some where we will need to compromise.
2. Be patient with yourself. This is new for everyone. Chances are if your kid is screaming in the background of a conference call, the other person/people on that call will also have a screaming child. (Cue video clips of that BBC interview. This is what is coming for all of us.) Some days might go according to plan. Somedays you will turn on Sesame Street on Amazon Prime and let it run all day so you can get what you need to get done. Most days will be a mix of ups and downs.
3. Be for real honest with yourself and your situation. I know folks who live with anxiety and depression. This is a tough time to carry that load. Perhaps you practice social distance but also social media distance. My Google Pixel has an app called Digital Wellness. I can set time limits on all my apps. If I meet that limit the app shuts down. Binging shows and movies can be great but if you know that will keep you inside and start a downward spiral, make a plan.
4. Schedules for kids? One size will not fit all. Do you have a child with a disability? ADHD? Look to your child's teacher for support. You don't have to have a degree - this is why we do. You might start to see your child acting in ways that are new to you. As educators we know that kids react to stress and anxiety in a variety of ways. Heck, you probably know this too. I mean, look at how adults react. Remember, sometimes it may seem like a tantrum or a meltdown comes out of nowhere. Our brains don't fully develop our prefrontal cortex (the part that keeps you planning and organized) until we are 30. (Perhaps this is why we see so many 20-somethings out there ignoring the call for social distance? SMH) Your child doesn't know what to do when their schedule changes. It works for a couple days but 2 - 10 weeks is different. They will look to you to set and enforce limits. As someone who has been in education for 15 years, and a parent for almost two years, I can tell you the best thing I have learned is that limits are love. Repeat that. Limits are love.
5. I saw someone ask about incentives. I think for some people this is a great idea! If you think this will work for your kid I have a couple suggestions. One is to make sure your child will earn that prize and it cannot be taken away. Another great tip is to reinforce your child using strategies rather than just getting tasks done. Saying "if" indicates that they might not earn that tv. But if your kid walked away 5 times and only missed one, there is going to be quite a fight after they feel like they worked so hard. By saying "when" you are telling your child you know they will get there and as soon as they do, bells will be ringing!
6. Kids under 5 years old. Whelp, good luck. Ha! My own toddler has no idea what a sticker chart is. I have no idea what is going to happen when the SO and I both have to have calls this week. I'm planning on living life in 15 - 30 minute chunks of time. Or perhaps one episode of Sesame Street at a time. I'm making a schedule for me, but I know it's going to change. Just like the world around us. Every. Damn. Minute.
Here's my schedule. Two adults, one working full time, one working 5 hour days, 900 square feet, no outdoor space, one toddler, two cats. We are early to bed and early to rise. Your life is different so if you want to use mine, adjust as needed, ignore as needed, laugh at my attempts to adult as needed. We'll see what happens. Good luck. You got this. WE got this. Don't forget to breath.
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